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How do you become more assertive at work?

Trying to become a leader on my team and I've noticed that the people at the top are not necessarily more talented, but seem to be more vocal, loud spoken, and assertive.


How do you guys build confidence to be more assertive without being condescending or mean? I dont want to be someone that just gets told what to do and pushed around based on someone else's priorities.

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ThufirHawatSoftware Engineer  
Aggressiveness comes from pride--people who think their idea is the best no matter what.

Assertiveness comes from the confidence of knowing who you are and what you're capable of. Someone can be both soft spoken and assertive.

If you want to become a leader on your team, then you have to learn how and when to speak up. As qddd said, leadership is social influence. If you can find a way to agree with people, then you can more easily turn them from one course of action to another.

For example, instead of saying, "no, that's a stupid idea" (aggressive) you could say, "we could do that, but here's what it's going to take. I've also got all these other things that I'm working on, so which of them do you think I should stop to do what you asked?" (Assertive)
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