I don't want to be a manager

Question

#ConfessionI have been a pure software engineer for 6 year of my career and have been serving as Engineering Manager for 1.5 years post that. I don’t want to be a manager anymore because I will have be an advocate of engineers in the team who have put efforts. Their effort might not have brought impact and the upper leadership will be furious about that and they will punish the team you are managing by means we all know. If you are not a good advocate and not good at putting a blame back at upper leadership (who in most of the cases is actual culprit), then you will allow culprits to punish non-culprits. The engineers in your team will be unhappy about it and curse you because punishment will be served through you. You will feel like you are bold when you are delivering the punishment. That's plain BS. You will be told that you are growing as a manager when you are doing wrong things. To handle such complex situations, you really need to be thoughtful, vigilant and put a lot of mental energy to be a good manager. I don't want to put energy on that front at this point because it is not exciting to me.Learning technical things and implementing them is exciting to me at this point of time and that's why I am chosing pure technical career path.

triplee121 · Accepted Answer

I feel this way too. I’m a pretty vocal/blunt person for better or worse. I’ve only been in management for 6 months but the politics are draining. I don’t feel like I have the capability, individually, to make enough positive change for me or my team. A lot of effort for what seems like little reward.

I told myself I’d give it a year before I say fuck it and and evaluate my happiness levels and go back to being an IC.

I’ve worked with my team for many years and honestly love each of them, they’re amazing people. Working with them isn’t what drains me. Leadership and upper management is what drains me.

I’ve had many horrible managers and few amazing managers as an IC. The amazing ones notably had my back and were interested in my individual development as an IC which is what I try to model but corporate politics make it very difficult to find time to do so.

I hope you’re able to find happiness in your work. I’m a firm believer in doing something you love so it doesn’t seem like a job. I’m not there right now either.

Vista · Answer

Completely valid feelings and it was a huge adjustment for me to make when I became a manager as well. My movement to manager actually kept getting delayed because even as an IC, I was always one to pushback on stupid upper leadership and my current managers didn't seem to like that at the time.

But at the end of the day, that's what drives me and my interest in being a manager. I love being the advocate and leading a team, and it's completely fine for you not to like that part (it definitely can suck).

Best of luck moving forward either way however you go!

HappyHippo · Answer

I've been an engineering manager at two companies and an IC at five companies, and only one of them had a culture and upper management practices as unhealthy as you describe. Most everybody was unhappy there and I got out as soon as I felt comfortable with the pandemic job market.

While I've enjoyed managing engineers and helping them grow, I've been sticking to IC roles for the last few years where my experience is valued and I can basically focus on being a technical mentor and leader for the ICs in my org. I've enjoyed that, but some companies expect staff-level ICs to be good at politics too, pushing their agenda while having no direct reports.

festinalente · Answer

Executive politics is a drag. And completely out of control in most orgs. God help you if you have the great misfortune of working in government.

sourmilk · Answer

Nothing wrong with that. Just follow the path you enjoy most 👏

I don't want to be a manager

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